My children initially woke me up tonight, but it seems the Lord had something in mind when they did.
I am going to be real with you, because I am being prompted in that direction and because it has been so long since I've really written my heart.
Before going to bed, I read about being invisible both here and here.
I cannot remember a time when I have not felt invisible. I can remember a feeling of being invisible on the playground as a child. I tried and tried my best to be recognized and noticed. I got straight A's, but I still felt invisible. As a teenager, I was awkward and shy, and scared to death that someone would notice me, and I certainly didn't want that, yet I did not want to be invisible either.
As a college student, I was sold out to the Lord, and He made me more visible because He was visible in me (I hope) by sending me to lands further from home to people I had never met before, yet I still wanted to remain hidden in the shadow of His wing. I wanted my visibility to be His light shining off of me. I have been a friend and a mom to many, yet I only have two children, and oftentimes, I feel invisible, not quite recognized, noticed, appreciated, or valued.
Even with this blog, I often struggle wondering if anyone will read, if my life really counts for something somewhere. We don't often see the finished product - both as moms, as friends, or in ourselves. We dare not truly understand the work He is doing in us behind the scenes.
God is invisible. Surely then, why does it matter that I feel invisible? Here is what His words says about His invisibility, I hope they speak to you:
"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him." Colossians 1:15-16
"But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Timothy 1:16-17
"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." Galatians 1:10
"But when God, who set me apart from birth and called me by his grace, was pleased to reveal his Son in me so that I might preach him among the Gentiles, I did not consult any man." Galatians 1:15-16
"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:1-2
Since doing Beth Moore's Esther study, I have been transformed and renewed. Although I have not been faithful every day in devoting myself to prayer and Scripture as I should, He remains faithful to me. He sees! It does not matter to me who else sees anymore. He has a purpose for me, and He's not finished with me yet. I will be His living sacrifice, pleasing to Him, not man alone, and I will remain invisible so long as He is alive and visible within me. I have had a couple of supernatural encounters with God, yet I have not seen Him face to face. He though has seen me in the secret place and knows me. Let His beautiful radiance be seen as I seek to follow Him each day.
My thoughts just kept coming back to "Word of God Speak" by Mercy Me, so that is the song I've chosen to share today. Please visit Amy at Sign, Miracles, and Wonders for more.
P.S. I would love you to join me on Monday for "Praying for their Footsteps." We will encourage one another to pray for our children using Scripture.