Safe People

Something I've been learning about lately is safe people and God's protection in our relationships. It is something I've never really thought in depth about before, and I don't have a lot of wisdom in this area. So what I'm saying here is just a few things I've learned, but I'm not claiming to have it all right. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments section.

I have always thought that you should stick with someone no matter how much they hurt you for the sake of the gospel message.  Love God Love People is the motto I've always tried to have, although it is just a motto and I fail at doing both things all the time.  I think as a people pleaser, in the past, I often put Love People ahead of Love God, and I didn't realize it. 

God showed me his grace, took me out of the deep pit I had dug, and set me out into a spacious place.  He healed me and set me free.  All of God's chosen people throughout history, be it the Israelites or Christians, have been called to be a set apart people, a holy nation.  Being set apart usually means separation.

If someone causes you to actively sin and is a stumbling block, they are not a safe person, and it is okay to separate yourself from them.  God may allow them back into your life as you mature, but that's His decision.  As Priscilla Shirer illustrated in her One in a Million study, you don't have to keep falling into that hole.  You can walk around the hole, and you can even take a different path.

So it is okay to cut yourself off from people who cause you to sin.  For example:

• that man or woman who always leads your thoughts down the wrong path even though you are happily married.
• the girls who grow insecurity in you because you never seem to fit in and are always striving to get them to like you.
• the girl who is easily angered and always yells
• the woman who regularly talks behind others backs and you wonder if she's taking your trusted secrets and giving them away.
• the woman who never seems to get around to asking you about your struggles but always finds time to talk your ear off about herself.
• ladies who never mutually share struggles; if you are the only one sharing, you cannot grow together.

In some way or another these men or women are unsafe, and it is okay to separate from them for a season until you grow in maturity or until God grows them in maturity to a place of mutual safety.

Though it hurts my heart to think it, I am probably an unsafe person to someone, and so are you.  It absolutely breaks my heart to hurt someone and I worry about it for days if I know I have hurt someone.  I seek to be gentle in spirit, but even then, sometimes I am unknowingly harsh.  Though I am highly sensitive myself, I don't always understand the sensitivities of others.  Sometimes when I've written blog posts, I haven't used the verbiage that pleases everyone.  Even though we can be unsafe and though we find others unsafe, as God's child, actively seeking after Him, He may use distance from others, short or long, to set us free from those sins we struggle with :  lust, insecurity, lack of self control, gossip, self-centeredness, inability to be transparent, and more.  This is God's manner of protection (though there are more I am sure), His wings gently hugging us closer to Him for a time or a season, until we can provide others grace without stumbling. 

Often we worry or fear that our separation will cause an unbeliever not to know Him.  However, He is a big God who can heal us and save him/her at the same time.  Allow Him to do His work and follow wherever He leads.

Hope Now

I have been working on posts from time to time, but as you see, I've posted nothing recently, so just this is just a quick post, which you may be seeing more of - who knows. I was discouraged as a mom this evening and in the middle of the night and this song made me feel better, so I thought I would post this to remind myself of the hope I have in God even when I feel overwhelmed and hopeless.



(VERSE 1)
If everything comes down to love
Then just what am I afraid of
When I call out Your name
Something inside awakes in my soul
How quickly I forget I'm Yours

(PRE-CHORUS)
I'm not my own
I've been carried by You
All my life

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(VERSE 2)
When my life is like a storm
Rising waters all I want is the shore
You say I'll be ok
Make it through the rain
You are my shelter my from the storm

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(PRE-CHORUS)
I am not my own
I've been carried by you all my life

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(CHORUS 2)
You've become my hearts desires
I will sing Your praises higher
Your love sets me free
(Your love sets me free)
Your love sets me free
(You love sets me free)
Your love sets me free

I'm a little Crazy today...

On a whim tonight, I decided to move Pea's bed into Princess's room and make it "their" room. It took about 10 minutes longer than usual to settle them down, but they are quiet, and I think, asleep right now, so that is a positive sign. There are a few reasons why I did this. The main reason would have to be that I need a room where there are absolutely NO toys. Why you ask? One, because I need Pea to go to asleep when it is nap time, and two, I need a safe place to put Princess during timeout. It has no reason whatsoever about a possible third child.

Princess is very aggressive when upset. I know you think she's sweet and smart and all that stuff, but thankfully God has given me wisdom to see that she likes to fight me and that she wants me to give her negative attention. Thus, I know that I have to separate myself from her or I will be driven to "fight" her so to speak. I can ignore her behavior, but she will attack me anyway. I walked away from her one day after she got upset, and she came after me to hit me. However, the ignoring of it seemed to do much better than reacting, so my main goal is to never yell and always remain calm, which can sometimes be hard to do. She does not stay on a naughty spot. When placed in a room to calm down, she will leave the room and come after me again. Sometimes the best thing is for me to lock myself in my room. I'm teasing, but only slightly. In all seriousness, her room is child protected, so that she cannot leave it now, and I will have a place to punish her so to speak. I pray that all of you reading will never have to go through what I do with her, but then again, I wish you had an inkling of what it is like too. I am trying to focus on positive rewards and give high praise as much as possible.

Please leave a comment letting me know that you will commit to pray for me for three things: one our mission trip to Arizona - I need lots of prayer about the plane ride with Pea and Princess's continued behavioral problems. Two, that Princess will learn to go to the potty all of the time consistently. She has regressed so much, I don't know what to do most of the time. I actually put her back in diapers for a few days, which she hates. It is on days that she has an accident that she rebels or on rebellious days that she has "accidents." The two seem to go hand in hand. I've stopped any kind of discipline associated with the potty other than the wearing of diapers. Third, and the main thing, that Princess would just want to obey. If she would obey, we would not have potty traumas. She would go when I asked her too instead of waiting until she can no longer wait.

I thank the Lord for YOU, my readers, even when I don't know you are reading, :)

3 as I see it

I had a revelation today about Princess and her state of mind and development. Just due to the general nature of things that have gone on with her, I have read a lot about the age 3 and what is proper development for that particular age, from a book my pediatrician recommended, "Your 3 Year Old: Friend or Enemy" by Ames & Ilg to generalities on BabyCenter. What I found out is that 3 year olds often go through a period of a return to babyhood followed by a period of strong willed outbursts. It is perfectly normal for a 3 year old not to have the strong-willed outbursts, but it is also perfectly natural for particularly strong children to have this period of development. During this phase of babyhood, kids often regress in their potty training behaviors and begin to pee and poop in their pants, stop wanting to dress themselves, and generally stop complying with activities that they have learned to do but could not do in babyhood. Usually the baby phase is a state of equilibrium and happiness, while 3 1/2, the tough phase, is a state of disequilibrium and testing boundaries.

So here's 3 as I see it for Princess. She has had no clearly defined baby phase or strong-willed phase. They have been intermingled, thus a lot of disequilibrium and testing. Three as I see it is like 12 or 13 is to adolescence. She is insecure and uncertain of wanting to move ahead as a kid. She's hoping she can go back to babyhood. This has been very tough for me to watch, because my Princess, until now, has been mostly confident of herself and her abilities. All of the sudden she needs me to take care of her again, and that's okay, but until I had this revelation, it did not seem okay. It was stressful and worrisome, not to mention my parenting confidence went way down. Growing up is hard to do! So if you have a 3 year old and he or she seems more distant than before, and he or she has started regressing or needing more attention, it is normal AND hang in there, baby him or her while you can, because they grow up fast, AND things WILL change.

Okay, so maybe this post is just a pep talk for myself...

Out of the Storm

Well, I took another blogging hiatus. Did you miss me? I missed you a little bit. ;)

I was in the midst of the storm of indecision about having more children and about where and when to go on a mission trip. Complex feelings toward the parenting of the two children I already have complicated my thoughts. And, I was comtemplating relationships about people that I just could not publicly blog about (not my husband or kids). So, I just needed to sit and be quiet and allow Him to work instead of publicly sharing my very complicated thoughts, and it really was a matter of not being able to publicly share some things God was working in me.

So here I am out of the storm in a place of peace. We have decided to take our family to Vail, Arizona, on a mission trip this summer in July before Pea's birthday. The other alternative was that I go to Peru by myself. I was afraid that even though I said yes to God, He was going to say no anyway. I believe my heart's desire was His desire too though. It is very scary to make such a decision with small children, considering that Princess is very disagreeable and Pea is wild and crazy. However, it is a faith decision. I know that I am weak as a parent, and I am hoping that God's strength is displayed in my weakness and that God's power is seen in every thing we do because honestly, I fear just going to babysit my kids. I asked God to specifically speak to me and He at first gave me, Psalm 28:1, to pray to Him. Since I have been in a place where I felt He was deaf to me, this Word alone from Him was a great encouragement, showing me that He did indeed intend to speak. Shortly after that, He directed me to another Scripture and I was a little uncertain of its message to me and feel that I will completely understand it after I go to Arizona with my family.

And another storm I mentioned was my parenting of my children. Princess has been such a challenge for so long that I was beginning to lose hope. I felt and still at times feel discouraged and hopeless. But I just submitted my cry to the only one who could help me - the Great Jehovah. Now, Princess is still strong willed and I am sure I will still lose it from time to time, but the great encourager spoke and I listened. This time He gave me Psalm 32:8-11. This word of instruction is to me and for my daughter too. He also directed me all over the bible and to other resources. The Ultimate Parent told me how to parent his daughter, my daughter, my Princess, in the way she needs parenting. So, most of all now I have confidence. I am her mother because I am capable of being her mother. I am her best earthly mother despite my humanity. Ultimately, God is the very best parent when I am unable to be the best and if He is guiding me, well, who can go wrong? If God is for me, who can be against me? (Romans 8:31)

So in finding peace in being a mother, I found peace in being a mother to additional children if God so blesses in that way. Being in a place of peace is right where I want to be - safe in the Father's arms.

Blogging Break?!

You may be wondering why I haven't blogged in a while - after all, it has been almost 2 weeks, and it is a little odd since I was blogging almost everyday. Well, one reason is that our computer is experiencing slowness, and we have yet to really diagnose the problem. Another reason would be blogger's block. I mean I've had things to tell you about but often times I couldn't figure out what or how to say them. Sometimes all I had to do was post some pictures, but I still didn't do it.

What have I been doing with all the extra time? Well, I have been in super home organization mode. I've been doing Christmas errands - I only need a couple of items now. I didn't use nap time to blog, but to work, and in the evenings, I was too tired to sit down at the computer and blog. Despite the fact that I haven't been writing about my thoughts, I've been using this time to think - a whole lot. In one of my last posts, I talked about how I was not being intentional with my time at the race track. This seems to be the case across the board of my life. I've just been floating along - which is a little rare for me, but I've let the kids become my excuse for just floating. At times, I have attempted to use my time to catch up with friends, which I realized that I had been neglecting, which could explain why my friendships are at times lacking. My friend, Lindy, and my sister, Jenn, would be glad to tell you that my weakness is definitely keeping in touch. At times, I will go into super friend mode and keep up with everyone for a while, and then I feel like I am doing all of the work, and I stop doing anything all together.

Have you ever read the "Parable of the Talents?" Do you remember what it says? You can read it here in Matthew 25:14-28. To sum it up, a servant master entrusted some of his property to three of his servants. Two of the servants invest their "talents", and one of them hides his "talent." The two that invest make more talents and are called "good and faithful servants." Verses 24 and 25 say, "Then the man who had received the one talent came. 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you." Well, I am this servant. I am not purposefully hiding the talent God is giving me, nor am I afraid to use my talent, but I have been lazy with it, which may be a far sadder statement.

So what do I intend to do? My life motto is love God, love people, so I intend to do that which will act out my motto.

• finding ways to have dates with my husband
• continue spending quality time with my children
• pray faithfully for friends, family, and those who need a relationship with our blessed Savior
• call or email friends
• make cookies for my neighbors during the holiday season or do a cookie swap and then follow up with new relationships
• reconnect with a new neighbor friend
• use the time I've saved by shopping early to be intentional with my conversations with family members and friends
• doing my house chores as one working for the Lord

I list these things here, so you, my readers - those of you that are part of the body of Christ, can hold me accountable, so that I will be faithful, and I can eventually be called "a good and faithful servant."

I just love the way that the Holy Spirit works in my life and how He will not be quiet until I act in the way He desires. Thank you, Lord, for your faithfulness to me despite my faithlessness to You and Your body.

What are some things that you believe God wants you to be intentional with or about?

Raking and a Sad First

Tonight, Princess helped daddy rake the yard, and Pea thought his pumpkin (the one in the upper left corner) was a ball, so he proceeded to say "Ball" and throw it all over the yard, even though daddy got the football out for him. I was expecting to take a picture of a smashed pumpkin, but indeed, it survived, this day at least. My pumpkin is the white one. The orange and green one is Princess's, and the other one is daddy's, and it will be the one we carve. I might paint mine.

If you will notice, there is a picture with Princess's hand stuck in a bowl of water (along with a pitcher, which is one of Pea's favorite toys). She had her first major injury - she got burned on a skillet today. She has always been so good around the stove, but nevertheless, we did not meet Target Zero at this house, but it was just minor, and we won't have any lost time over it. ;)

The last pic is the soup we had tonight. Daniel felt it should be documented, so I include it here - it is black and white bean soup and was very healthy and yummy.

And some very sad news, granny has been ordered nothing by mouth - including food and drink. She did not want to have a feeding tube, so she'll be with Jesus anytime now. I hate the thoughts of her suffering - please pray she'll go home quickly.

Sadly and prayerfully,

What does this mean?

Princess is officially potty trained - she's been working for a Cinderella doll for a long time now. We started a chart to see if she could make it two weeks with no accidents and full cooperation, and she made it! She's definitely mastered, for the most part, the potty. Sorry the pictures are not the best - she was too excited! Her love for Cinderella is priceless - it is for her a GREAT reward! She got it on Saturday, and Cinderella goes everywhere with her. We wonder how long it will last!

Harper Family Hero

Cue music from the "someone special" song from Higglytown Heroes

Imagine your kids have had a horrible stomach virus, and you have not left your home with them in days. But today, it is time for flu shots, and it is raining torrential sheets and buckets of rain, and you have to help two small children safely to the car, to their car seats, and then to the doctor's office, and then back to the car...

It sounds like a job for someone special....

Princess and Pea sing:
"Someone special, who could it be?
This job's too big for you and me.
We need some help.
But never fear-o.
It looks like a job - for a Harper family hero.
A Harper Family Hero!

Mommy Jamie sings:
I'm a Harper family hero, brave and true.
I help the family with the things I do.
So look real hard and you will see
That you can be a hero, just like me!
A hero just like me.

When the kids are sick and laundry seems the only thing to do,
I'll keep them happy by singing the cow says Moo.
When you've gotta get a flu shot
and the rain is all you've got,
grab the umbrella and plan,
to dash from the van,
as fast as you can,
and then we'll all stay dry,
and there'll be nooo time to sigh! nooo, time to sigh!
Yes, I'm a Harper family hero, bold and good,
I help my family, just like I should.

Singing altogether now:
So we'll work together, that's what we'll do,
So we can be a hero
just like you (like me)
a hero just like you!

cue Higglytown (I mean Harper family) fireworks.

Migraines and Humanity

Sometimes, in the blogginess of it all, I don't know what to write or where to start.


I missed bible study, but I checked out the Beth Moore video from our church library, and I am all caught up on that end. I am who God says I am was this week's lesson and what the homework is about. In love, I am blessed, chosen, adopted, accepted, redeemed, and forgiven. How amazing. Beth made an excellent point - what adopted child is not wanted or longed for?


You know sometimes I just get so wrapped up in my own humanity. Yesterday, despite doing what was probably best for Pea, I went home to visit my mom and my granny. It had been a while since I'd visited - almost a month, and I know every day that passes we are one day closer to granny going home to Jesus, so I went to visit anyhow, even though Pea wasn't quite his normal self - sometimes I cave into the family pressure. I always try to do what is the very best for the kids, but sometimes I am swayed by what someone else believes the very best is. The timing of it all could not have been more off. I have to say that going home to visit, albeit only an hour away, is a difficult journey with two little mutchkins. I mean, it just takes a lot of time to load them up and get going. Princess is on a very slow pace - not a hurry up and go modern pace. By the time we got there, it was already almost 11 o'clock. We had to get gas and I went to get a dollar drink at McD's. Not the best of situations considering that Pea needs naps during the day, and he rarely even if dogged tired sleeps in the car. And for some reason, grandmothers rarely think that kids need naps - what's up with that?

Then I got a bad migraine, and the visit ended sooner rather than later, which in hindsight was probably a blessing in disguise. But the migraine got me worrying about my health and wishing I had time to go to the doctor or join a gym. Mentally, I could just list all of my negatives off before me. None relating to the act of mothering, but the sacrifices of mothering. Then, I watched the Beth Moore video, and my perspective changed. I have a God who is taking care of me when I am taking care of everyone else besides myself, and He allows me to call to Him for help, and He gives it. He always has His best for me, and He is never swayed by anyone else's opinion. So when I need help going to the doctor, I can call to Him (and my husband) and say, "Help." Rest assured, God will come to the rescue in some fashion. :)

What will I forget this week?

So since I've started bible study I forget something every week. The first week I forgot an extra set of clothes for Princess in case she had an accident. She did. The second week I forgot my bible and bible study and had to rush home for it. I also put Princess's cup in Pea's bag, and his in hers. The third week I left Pea's sippy cup at home. I had prepared it, but I gave it to Pea before we left, and then he, of course, left it somewhere, and I forgot about it. I bet the childcare workers were wondering why she had a cup and he did not. So the naked truth is that sometimes I am scattered, and that's okay with me. I've come to accept it, even though I like to be put together (maybe not in appearance, but in organization).

So what do you think I will forget this week? And, what are some of the silliest "forgets" you've had?

Challenges

This was a challenging weekend. Princess has become quite difficult. We went to artwalk, and at the end of it, we got popsicles from the ice cream truck. We thought this would be a fun treat for everyone, but instead it was not. She did not want whatever we decided to get for her, I guess. We handed her the popsicle and instead of eating it, she just looked at it. We told her to eat it and started walking, and then, she starting screaming, blood curdling screams to the top of her lungs (on a very crowded busy street). I stopped to see what the problem was, but she was only able to scream, not talk. I decided that maybe she wanted mine and offered her a bite, but she refused, so I picked her up and kept walking. Mine ended up falling on the ground, so I ended up with no treat, and then of course, she said mommy I want a bite. Scream, scream, scream! when I told her it was gone. And hers was still melting. At one point, I took it and began eating it myself - cleaner that way, but still I kept saving her some until it melted away.

Then my mom and I preceded to get into an argument, when all I was doing was trying to relay the story to her. I was naturally upset because I am sad to see ungratefulness in my daughter's heart, and very little actually seems to work in regards to discipline these days. It takes me a while to process my thoughts, thus the reason I write. But I mentioned it, and it was handled poorly on both our parts. I just needed some encouragement and hope.

And today we saw Princess in action at church. Not a pretty sight when she gets together with her best friend. She has some compassion but very little.

My main struggle is relating to my daughter. While she has many similarities to me, she is very different as well. I just want to know and understand her and help her to walk in obedience and respect for people and things, which will hopefully lead to an obedience and respect for God. She needs a lot of attention, and Pea needs less, but he demands it, because he's so much busier. I think she feels neglected. And I think that's what motivates the negative behavior. It is hard not to feel a little guilty, even though I so very glad to be blessed with both of my children. So I'm going to do the best I can about keeping structure, and see how that goes with improving things for her.

ugh!

So what happens when you write a blog about eternal life? You find out if you are willing to live it out, that's what!

Since I've been so bold, I've found myself in predicaments and sorrows and sadness and the truth of the message has been put to the test. For starters, the kids and I went to visit my mom Friday, and we visited my mom's parents and my dad's parents. For those of you who do not know, my mom's mom (granny) is in the nursing home recovering from a broken hip and her dad (papa) is recovering at home from a stroke he had last year. He is unable to be "home alone" as he has become very dependent on others with the heart of an independent person. In other words, he cannot do what he desperately wants to do because of all the possible accidents he could have. My dad's mom (grandmother) has lymphoma, which has also progressed to skin cancer. And my dad's dad (pa or sometimes grandpa) is moderately healthy with possible prostate cancer developing.

If these things aren't depressing on their own, going and visiting for a sliver of time is. Watching my granny's heart hurt so much when she might lose her foot. Her choices are open heart surgery or losing a foot! or a leg! And she is on the last days of her life and I know she'd rather not have either surgery. Finding the words to comfort and encourage really do not seem there and when they are, they don't seem enough.

And then Saturday, my little girl starts talking while we were swimming, and her words allude to possibly my dad, who she has never known because he died unexpectedly almost 4 years ago.

Sunday both of the children were little terribles as we were getting ready for church, and I struggled to maintain my focus on God through it all. Then I went to church and heard about homeless children in Las Vegas who go home hungry and actually have to hide food and clothes from their parents, so their parents would not steal it from them - the kids! Some of the things I heard about the LV schools and kids were not too different from the world I grew up in Walker County.

And then as I listened to them talk about encounters they had with other women in LV, I began to identify (perhaps my empathy coming out, i'm not sure) with the women they talked about. This part is hard to talk about and I am going to lay it out there for the world to see, but I do not make friends easily. It used to be my horrible shyness, but now, I guess I am just not a good friend and most people don't like being around someone who wants to go deeper and not just stay at the surface. I don't know why I don't attract friends, but I just don't. I do long for a deep friendship, but most of my friendships have been in passing, and when I left one stage of life for another, so the friend went too. I'm currently in the stage of life where if you are best friendless you are very unlikely to find one. So when they talked of women desperate for attention and help preparing their classrooms I thought that could be me if I didn't know Christ.

I am satisfied with God and the gifts he gives me because I know it is for my benefit. If I am not blessed with abundant friendship, I know he uses it for a reason, but the lost world, (those who know nothing of the fullness of God's love) cannot possibly understand this. And I sometimes find myself at odds for this, for if I, a believer, long for connection within my own church family, how do I bring a newcomer into such a place. For this void I have, I totally DO long for another home - and the best friend I could possibly ever have to sit face to face to (maybe occasionally, we will all be given an opportunity to meet with Him so intimately).

So eternal life is now, but the narrow path can be lonely and cumbersome, and sometimes filled with goose poop (if you are walking at Spain Park).

Poop?

Okay, so just in case you didn't want to read about a poop accident, you saw in the title what this one was going to be about.

Tonight we went to Costco, and when we got home, I had to discipline A. While I was doing that, Daniel went to change E. I go upstairs, and Daniel tells me, E is in his room and I just changed his diaper. He makes a point to tell me that he has a clean diaper on, so I tell A to go upstairs because we are going to get ready for bed. She is taking off her clothes and putting on her jammies. E is crawling around and walking, with his clothes hanging loosely as Daniel did not button them up after he "diapered" him. Then I noticed him doing a #2, so I go to get him to change him and put his jammies on when yes, I find that he has no diaper on whatsoever!! Oops! I was just wondering if these things ever happen to anyone else?

BTW, E has started walking pretty good these days. And A is almost potty trained. The whole potty training thing has taken us a long time, maybe we started too early, maybe not early enough. But we are finally getting somewhere. I'm certainly no expert!

Getting Older

Sadly everyone does it. My mom is now taking care of her parents, my granny and my papa. My PaPa had a stroke last October and has needed a great deal of care since then. My granny has been declining in health for quite some time, so she could not take care of him when he came home for good from the nursing home in January (I think). So my mom has become their caretaker. Only, she does not live with them. She visits them several times throughout the week and makes their meals for them. For a long time, my PaPa could not have truly solid foods - only blended or mashed foods, but now, he can eat most things safely. Anyhow, the past few months there has become more and more of a need for full time care of my grandparents. My mom is single and retired, so to speak, so she can help them. But then she doesn't have anyone to relieve her, and it is a thankless and tiring job that she does for them. She would really like to spend more time with my kids, but she is not able to do that as much. When she does visit me or my sister, I think she probably does it for her sanity even though maybe she should stay all the time with my grandparents. My dad passed away 3 1/2 years ago, and her brother has to work. At times, my mom, a widow herself, needs a lot of help she doesn't get either (yardwork, home repair, etc. - whatever happened to taking care of the widows). It seems very hard to do the things you should do in today's world because it is so busy.

My grandparents have not responded well to sitters, and their money will run out very quickly if they had to have one regularly. It is just a sad situation that there is not something to help out aging people to be able to afford the nursing home or assisted living or something. Sunday, my granny fell and broke her hip in one place and pelvis in two places. I just think they will definitely need constant care now - maybe my mom will move in with them or something. When you are thinking about how many kids to have or how to save what precious little money you have, you need to think about what you will do at the end of life too. I guess I don't know a good answer for this situation and wish someone knew some good thoughts about it.