"For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will." Ephesians 1:4-5
A few months ago, I had an ah-ha moment about boundaries. I have always had an ability to see both sides of the coin and that has made some decision making hard for me, as I recognized the shades of gray. However, some things I thought were black and white that were really gray. Some things just seemed wrong to me because I had not learned that we come with personal God given boundaries via our emotions. A minor example would be you choose to be a stay at home mother, but you send your baby to the Mother's Day Out program at church. Your God given boundaries may say you need some space from your baby so as to be a good mother. Not recognizing each person's boundaries could give one space to judge that person - "she's a stay at home mother. Why would she send a baby to a mother's day out program?"
However, recognizing that people have limits (that I may not understand) helps me to be judgement free. Whatever I would have wrongly judged in the past, I no longer do. I do think God wants us to move beyond our own comfort zone of self limits and boundaries and widen our borders, our boundaries, like Jabez prayed, but until He does that, they provide protection and safety when needed. God may be working on you to heal you, to bring you out of sin, but He loves you no less while you are in the midst of the sin than when you are set free from the sin. Jesus was perfect so you do not have to be. Yes, God may be in the business of perfecting you, but that's His business, not yours. You just have to be willing, moldable, submitted to Him.
God loves you completely today, yesterday, and tomorrow. You may be dirty and messy with sin, but you do not have to clean yourself up to come to Him. He lives you just as you are today and always. He does the cleaning, and we don't have to do His work for Him. He is going to accomplish His work no matter what.
With that being said, I am learning to love people just as they are. Messy. Dirty. Sinful people. Sure, I am human, coming with my own set of issues, but I am learning to love like Christ does - just as you are no matter where you are in the journey. If we are called to be like Christ and He loved people where they were, then I am going to try to do the same, and I know He will teach me. After all, didn't Jesus hang out with the tax collectors and prostitutes? If you read something that makes you feel judged here, ask yourself if it is the Holy Spirit convicting you of sin. Otherwise, it is a judgement free zone.