Am I a Proud or a Broken Person toward others?

From Nancy Leigh DeMoss's book, "Brokenness: The Heart God Revives."

1. PROUD PEOPLE FOCUS ON THE FAILURES OF OTHERS AND CAN READILY POINT OUT THOSE FAULTS. **Broken people are more conscious of their own spiritual need than of anyone else's.
2. PROUD PEOPLE HAVE A CRITICAL, FAULT-FINDING SPIRIT. THEY LOOK AT EVERYONE ELSE'S FAULTS WITH A MICROSCOPE BUT VIEW THEIR OWN WITH A TELESCOPE. **Broken people are compassionate - they have the kind of love that overlooks a multitude of sins; they can forgive because they know how much they have been forgiven.
3. PROUD PEOPLE ARE ESPECIALLY PRONE TO CRITICIZE THOSE IN POSITIONS OF AUTHORITY - THEIR PASTOR, THEIR BOSS, THEIR HUSBAND, THEIR PARENTS - AND THEY TALK TO OTHERS ABOUT THE FAULTS THEY SEE. **Broken people reverence, encourage, and lift up those that God has placed in positions of authority, and they talk to God in intercession, rather than gossiping about the faults they see in others.
4. PROUD PEOPLE ARE SELF-RIGHTEOUS; THEY THINK HIGHLY OF THEMSELVES AND LOOK DOWN ON OTHERS. **Broken people think the best of others; they esteem others as better than themselves.
5. PROUD PEOPLE HAVE AN INDEPENDENT, SELF-SUFFICIENT SPIRIT. **Broken people have a dependent spirit; they recognize their need for God and for others.
   

Said by Princess

Today we were driving home from the park, and Princess said, "Mommy, what do squid eat?"
Me: "I'm not sure - plankton or sea bugs or something like that maybe. I don't know."
Princess pauses a few minutes, and then: "Mommy, we should ask God. He will know what squid like to eat."

Yes, indeed, God knows. I love it!

Brokenness

It is so funny how God works. For some time now, God has been working behind the scenes in me on selfishness, humility, and pride. I blogged about it briefly in one of my posts, but I don't remember which one now. God has been dealing with it so much so that I felt called to write a bible study about it. I had this nagging feeling about it. I did a little research about it, but not too much. I kinda thought about it, yet I did not let it persist me either. Two weeks ago, God had me outline the study I was to write.

In all of the persistence (read sarcastically) I mentioned earlier, I checked out a book from the library six weeks ago called, "Brokenness: The Heart God Revives" by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. I finally finished reading it today because it is due tomorrow. (Just keeping it real!) It is an awesome, highly recommended read. You will definitely get something out of it, and it is a short book. However, you might want to take longer to savor it than I did. I mentioned my desire to write this study to my accountability partner, and she directed me to some other resources that came to her mind on humility.

This book and her resources seem to confirm that I go ahead with the time and effort of writing a bible study. How odd and strange, as even though I love to study Scripture, I don't find myself altogether qualified or capable of writing a study for anyone to actually study - not to mention one on pride and humility - who reallys wants to submit to that? :) I keep telling myself that this study will be written for me, and so I believe it to be. And to be quite frank, I am not one to finish something of this magnitude on my own. With that said, I feel that I must continue to be broken before you - humble to bring repentance before you in truthfulness. And I will be sharing a series of surveys from the "Brokenness" book about the way you can inventory your heart and determine whether you are prideful or broken.

Below are some quotes I enjoyed from the book:

"Again and again, God's Word reveals that he is not as concerned about the depth or extent of the sin we commit as he is about our attitude and response when we are confronted with our sin." p.65

p. 67 she notes the anguish of soul one must feel

"It is in His very nature to be repulsed by pride and to draw near to those who have a humble, broken spirit." p. 68

"I believe one of the reasons that so many people live with chronic loneliness is that they are unwilling to die." p. 104

"True Christian community, as Pastor Ray Ortlund described it, is something few believers ever experience, because it requires that each individual let go of "self" and pour out his life on behalf of others." p. 105

A Call to Anguish

A friend posted this on facebook. Brokenness and humility are what God keeps trying to teach me, and when I am faithful to dig, he has me searching the Scripture for these things. This stirred my heart, so I wanted to post on here.

The Crippled Lamb

It's been a while since I've done a book review, and today I read this little book to Princess.
It seems it was written especially for me.
It is about a lamb who is crippled and often feels left out and alone.
But it turns out that God has a special plan for the lamb because he is different.

This is a message I think we all need to hear,
and is especially important to teach children
because children always seem to go through periods of insecurities.
All of us were created with a weakness.
And God can use us through our weakness for His glory.
But I think I liked this little reminder today more than sweet Princess.
I loved this little book.

"Take a good look, friends, at who you were when you got called into this life. I don't see many of "the brightest and the best" among you, not many influential, not many from high-society families. Isn't it obvious that God deliberately chose men and women that the culture overlooks and exploits and abuses, chose these "nobodies" to expose the hollow pretensions of the "somebodies"? That makes it quite clear that none of you can get by with blowing your own horn before God. Everything that we have—right thinking and right living, a clean slate and a fresh start—comes from God by way of Jesus Christ. That's why we have the saying, "If you're going to blow a horn, blow a trumpet for God." 1 Corinthians 1:26-31, The Message

Oh, amen to that passage.

New Verses to Memorize

I have not been faithful to post my scripture memory verses on here lately. But I have a new accountability partner, and she is helping me get back in the groove. I have found that summer has kept me busy, and I like being busy, so much so that now that the busyness of summer is gone, I am bored and unsure how to manage my time with the kids. One of the things I have decided to do to stay on task is to get Princess to memorize her verses while I memorize mine.

Princess's verse to work on:
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right." Ephesians 6:1 (sung to This Little Light of Mine)
If we sing this much, I think Speed Racer will learn it too.

My verse:
My soul longs, yes, faints for the courts of the Lord; my heart and flesh sing for joy to the living God. Psalm 84:2

Praying for their Footsteps

Father God,
Thank you for my children.
Let Speed Racer grow as Jesus did, in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men. (Luke 2:52)
I pray that Princess will enjoy good health and that all will go well with him. (3 John 2)
Cause Princess and Speed Racer to be devoted to one another in brotherly love, honoring one another above themselves. (Romans 12:10)
I pray that Princess and Speed Racer would both confess with their mouths that Jesus is Lord, and that each one would believe in his own heart that you have raised Christ from the dead. Cause Princess and Speed Racer to call on your name, Lord, and save him. (Romans 10:9, 13)

I praise You for Your Goodness and Your Glory, Father.
You are Holy.
By You and Through You ALL things were created.
There is no one above You.
Amen.

Comfort Zone

Last Friday, I drove the kids to mom's house to visit with her and my grandparents. As I was driving, I really felt like I the "summer vacation" of my mind was over, and now would be the time to crank out some more blogs. I had a myriad of posts running through my mind as I drove.

When I first started blogging, the blog world was a safe place to be. I could write my heart out, and not too many people would be reading it. I certainly wanted to be read, but at the same time, if I wrote or said something crazy, I was not worried about too many people reading it. I had very little going on in my life in the way of relationships, so in a sense, I had nothing to lose. I sent the link to my friends, but I did not have many close friends, and the ones I did have were not interested in reading my heart cries on this blog. That was a little disappointing, but at the same time, I just kept writing away and trying to minister to someone else in a similar life circumstance - hoping without ever knowing that this blog reaches someone for Christ. I put my name in blog circles and waited and still not much happened. But somewhere along the way, people started reading.

I was thinking about how I feel somewhat of a celebrity for anyone to want to read my blog, and I know I don't have as many readers as a big time blog would. Being someone who prefers to be behind the scenes, this is a little funny to me - seeking to achieve blog readership yet wanting to be unknown - how can the two coexist right? And my church has started a blog, Valleydale Church blog, and it links to my blog, so suddenly I feel a little shy as you might go to church with me and know me, but I may not know you. *sigh* Regardless, I am just Jamie, a simple girl, who sees God in big ways in small things - one little reminder that God finds significances in things and people who seem sorta insignificant - like me and maybe like you. You are significant and important to God. You are loved by Him with the deepest love imaginable, and as I seek Him, I will continue to pour out my heart and step out of my comfort zone. So more blogs and thoughts to come soon.

Family Pictures

My family and I recently had some pictures taken by a friend, Sarah Cook. Sarah goes to church with us, and she just started her own photography business, Cookwire Photography. We wanted to take advantage of her 50% off sale that she has going on this month, so we met her at Aldridge Gardens this past Saturday.

She posted some pictures of us on her blog. She is a phenomenal photographer, and I thought you would enjoy seeing a few of our photos. If you are in the area and need some photos, she's your gal. You will enjoy getting to know her. Not only are her photos phenomenal, but she is too. She is a wife and mom to three children, one who has autism. If you need any more information about autism, she has several resources listed here.

A New Nickname for Pea

I have thought long and hard for a new nickname for Pea. He just isn't a pea anymore, and he certainly isn't a princess though he plays with them just like Princess does. If this is weird, well, try telling a brother and sister not to share and see what happens and then try telling them that this stuff is one's and this stuff is the others - chaos ensues, so for now, he plays with Princess dolls too, but in a totally different way.

Back to my point. I have given him a new nickname - a few were tossed around - Pockets, Mr. Pea, Prince, Bug, and probably a few I am forgetting. Now, the name I have chosen is perfect - it fits his personality to a tee. However, it is not truly a label I would like to give my little Pea. Pea is a much safer, friendlier name. Especially considering that my brother and father in law (and less frequently my husband) race go-karts, and I would prefer that no child of mine continue in this tradition. I am none to happy thinking of sending my son riding off into the sunset on a motorcycle to come home lucky to be alive as did my mother in law with my brother in law. Nor would I prefer to see my son go off to war. That being said, a lot of the things my children do or become will be in my control, but a lot will not, and I will ultimately leave them in the safest hands imaginable just as I said in my Psalm 139 prayer. God is the one who holds my children in His hands, in His care, in His safety at all times. I can do my job as a parent, but He is the ultimate parent, seeking and searching for each one in ways that I can never do. So I am hoping not to write his future by the name I've picked and entrust that someday he will need yet another new nickname, because he has slowed down (truly I can't imagine it, but still). What's the nickname you ask - Speed Racer.

Bullying and Whispering

Well, the summer has flown by, and since my kids are not in school yet, it still seems like summer for me. While I have a myriad of posts that I would like to write about and catch up on, it would simply just keep me hiding away in this house with no new blog posts, SO once again, I'm just gonna start with where I am today.

Princess is having potty troubles again, and Pea has started hitting, bullying, and beating up the big boys on the playground. All at only 2 years of age. This is quite a conundrum for a mother. While I am sure there is humor in both situations, I really just want to pull my hair out and scream, "Why me?" But alas, God does have a purpose, if not His own divine sense of humor, that is for me and these little crazies. Just today, we met some friends from church at Chick-fil-a for a breakfast playdate. Well, let me back up to say that hubby and I took the kids to Chick-fil-a over the weekend, where Pea proceeded to hit a little baby girl while in the playground where we could not see him (of course), so neither one of us really knew what had happened. We tried to assume the best, but mentally I was thinking my baby has beaten another baby up.

So back to today, we go and of course, I seemed to be the only mother who had to pay absolute attention to every detail her kids were doing. I mean, my kids seemed to be the only hoodlums there. I am sure all the other mommies were having delightful conversations none of which I was able to participate in for very long. First, Pea clung to me. Then he got stuck, and he seriously, did not know what to do without Princess in the playplace with him. Princess had decided she was not ready to play yet. Finally, she goes in there, and they proceed to act a fool in the playplace. Then Pea hits a boy. I have no idea if it was provoked or not. None at all, but what I proceeded to see was shocking. Little boy who is actually bigger than both Pea AND Princess proceeds to try to hit my son back, so Princess steps in front of Pea and hits Little Boy. Then they proceeded to get in a toddler brawl. Mom of Little Boy and I rushed into the playarea to stop said brawl. Oh. My. Word! What! Just. Happened?

Never fear there was discipline. I am going to have to search the bible for a verse against hitting and for peacemaking. However, when I told hubby about it, he was a proud papa and acted as though it was the best thing that ever happened. Well not really, sorta, but he seriously, told me not to tell Princess "not to hit back" as I had said.

The afternoon was filled with frustrating potty experiences and me thinking God must have forsaken me. Hubby came home. I whipped up a fast unplanned dinner, and then he and Pea went to the store, and Princess and I took a walk. It was a very delightful walk, as she is very fun to talk too. She said that the wind lives in the clouds, but that God decided when to open the door for the wind and when to close the door, so that's how it gets windy. And that God likes to color and do crafts. I said yes, He does. He colors everything we see and even our hearts. We talked about strange things like the road being old and its cracks and how everything needs renewing from time to time (like getting new pavement and a new heart from God).

Then we came home and read Goldilocks and the Three Bears. When we heard our boys get home we turned the lights out and hid in the dark living room. Neither one of my kids like the dark very much, so Princess said, "But it's scary." And I said, "But I am here." Princess: "Oh, yeah, it's not so scary like this." (huddled together) And then the Holy Spirit whispered in my ear, "Remember that - I am with you always even when it seems scary. What do you have to be afraid of with me?" I suppose that means even when my kids are acting afool, bullying, and mothers are looking at me as if I am the scum of the earth. Yes, even then, He is with me. How wonderful is that!

Praying for their Footsteps

If you haven't noticed, the blog has been quiet here. Maybe it's because I've been busy this summer, or maybe it's because I've felt more peace in my soul, or because there are some things you want to blog about but you just cannot. At any rate, my home has been so much more peaceful since deciding to follow Him in mission to Arizona. The crazy problems we were having with Princess seem to have somewhat resolved. Yes, she is still emotional at times, but in the normal scheme of things, not in an overwhelming-I'm-not-sure-how-to-deal-with-this kind of way. I don't have a real dramatic story, but God uses us in whatever our story is. It IS dramatic to Him, because each one of us is oh so special to Him (no intent to sing the Special Agent Oso theme song there). I am praising Him for the changes I have seen in my family since I've started posting my prayers here and since my family has pursued Him in mission together.

Today I want to share a prayer of praise, peace, and trust for myself and the kids from Psalm 34:1-14.

O Lord, I pray that I will bless You at all times; that your praise would be continually in my mouth. I pray that I would teach both Princess and Pea to do the same as they get older.
My soul boasts in the Lord; let the humble hear and be glad.
May my children delight in hearing praises to You, O Lord.
May Princess, Pea, and all you reading, join with me in magnifying His name.
Let all of us exalt His name together.
(Think of the good things He has done for you.)

I sought You, and You answered me
and continue to deliver me from all my fears, especially in regards to my family.
Those who look to You are radiant (including my family from time to time)
and our faces (in your radiance) will never be ashamed.
I cried out and You heard me and saved me.
The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear You, and You deliver them.

Oh, my readers, Princess, Pea, taste and see that the Lord is good!
Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!
Oh, continue to fear Him all who know Him,
for those who do lack for nothing.
Young lions suffer want and hunger;
but those who seek You lack no good thing!

Come, Princess, Pea, listen to me as I tell you His words
I will teach you the fear of the Lord.

Lord, keep my tongue and Princess's and Pea's tongue from evil
and our lips from speaking deceit.
May the children and I turn away from evil and do good;
seeking peace and pursuing it!

Happy Birthday Pea!

My little Pea is 2 years old now, and I am thinking about giving him a new blog nickname, because pretty soon he won't be a pea anymore. :)

Since his birthday was the Monday after we got back on Saturday from our mission trip, we did not do much of anything special that day. In fact, it was not the best day. The kids (and me too) were still adjusting to coming home and getting into the groove of life here. However, I did decide to make him some birthday cookies. Unfortunately for him, they were "Deceptively Delicious" birthday cookies, so probably not the most fun cookies. But, fortunately for me, neither of the kids seemed to notice the deception. :)

Here are some pics of the eating of the cookies:


Still more to come on the birthday party...

Praying for their Footsteps - Psalm 139

I bet you thought I forgot about my own idea to pray for my kids - nope! We've been studying the Psalms at church, and this week we studied Psalm 139. This is one of my all time favorite Psalms, and I thought I would use The Message version along with my own attempts to paraphrase this week to pray for Princess and Pea. Remember if you want to join in to do this too, just add a comment to my blog, as I'm not using Mr. Linky right now.

God, investigate Princess's and Pea's life; get all the facts firsthand.
Each one is an open book to You (even when they are mysterious to me);
even from a distance, You know what each one thinks.
You know when each one leaves the room and when each one comes back;
however, neither one is ever out of Your sight!
You know everything each one says to me each day and the sounds they make
even before the sound or word is ever uttered.
When each one looks around, You are there, everywhere they look -
in the trees, in the sky, in the kitchen, in the bathtub.
Your reassuring Presence is there wherever they are;
You protect them from the boogie man much better than I
and linger even when their fear is gone.
It is almost too much, how wonderful, so wonderful
that is hard for me to even understand much less explain it to the kids.

Is there anyplace Princess or Pea can avoid you?
Are they ever out of Your Sight?
If they climb as high as the sky, You are still there with them!
If they go far underground, You are still there with them!
Even when I am not with them (as now they are asleep in their room),
You are with them!
If they ran away from me as far as they could go out of my eyesight,
You would be their waiting on them going before them.
If they were lost to me, they would be found in You.
Even when it is dark, it is as light to You
because darkness isn't dark to You - it's all the same.
You still see them.

You shaped them even as they grew in my womb.
And I am convinced that you knew them more intimately than I
even before You placed them there.
How I thank You for these precious little ones!
O Magnificent One - You have made each one marvelously,
both body and soul, inside and out.
My adoration is for You in creating each one just as they should be.
You know all about them - in and out,
you know every bone in their sweet bodies,
you know their organs, even each cell that forms all the rest.
You know exactly how Princess and Pea are made
You sculpted them from nothing into something
You know the whole story of their lives,
from conception to the grave to eternity -
all the stages and developments they will achieve You have already seen.
Every day that they will live has already been prepared for them.

Your thoughts are beautiful to me, O God.
Please allow Princess and Pea to find Your thoughts beautiful as well.
Even though we can never comprehend them or even count them.
Let me rise in the morning and live always with You,
and let my children want to do the same!
God, we wait for You to do away with wickedness forever.
Some belittle You, but may my children never want to do this.
Let them never be infatuated with cheap god-imitations.
Let them hunger only for the Real Thing.

Investigate them, Know them,
Find out all about Princess and Pea (and give me wisdom),
Get a clear picture of what each one is all about
(and let me have a picture of it too)
Guide Princess
Guide Pea
on the road and pathway to eternal life.

Today

I am going to follow my friend Brooke's lead, and just start with today as opposed to trying to catch you up on everything that I have experienced in the past three weeks.

I had a biopsy on my thyroid, and for that update, everything turned out fine. The mission trip was awesome, and I will have more to say about it on another post.

Today, we got up and ate and then we listened to VeggieTales, which we often do after breakfast. Pea had a birthday last week, and a birthday party last weekend, and we still had not really opened a few of the presents yet. He received two types of train sets, and we weren't sure what to do with them, but ultimately we kept and opened both of them - they were both Thomas the Tank Engine sets, just different types. He went crazy for them - absolutely crazy. And so did Princess.

We were all out of diapers, so we went to Wal-Mart, and then met some friends at Chick-Fil-A for lunch. Chick-Fil-A was packed out, and Princess and Pea got to sit at a kids table with their friends. Then they played in the oh-so-loud playroom. I was proud of my kids today - they were so obedient and even sat quietly at the table for a while before we left. We came home to Thomas, played a bit, and then off to bed for Pea. Princess played with Thomas and then her ponies that we found on clearance at Target a few days ago.

Then Pea got up. We played and played with Thomas. Daddy came up to see our new Thomas fun.

After dinner, we went to the park, were the kids played and ran and ran in the grass. Then we got sno cones for a treat. Tomorrow we are going to see the trains at the Heart of Dixie Railroad Museum. Our friend, Jeremy, owns a caboose, and we are hoping to ride it.

So this is not my favorite kind of blog to write, but there you go, a summary of what we've done today.

What I hope to blog about soon:
1. Our Mission Trip / Vail, AZ
2. Pea's birthday
3. Bible study thoughts
4. New memory verses

The Truth for Barbara and any others who need to know THE Way,

I received the following comment on my last post:
"Hello! In your sidebar: "Unreached people of the day...". Unreached? No one is "unreached", because evryone is a child of God, no matter which religion or belief they have. There's no religion, who is the "right" religion. All ways leads to God. God is evrywhere and in all beings, and all beings are in God. Barbara"

I don't have Barbara's contact information or I would contact her directly, but I hope you visit again, Barbara, and are able to read my response to you.

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to You,
O Lord, My Rock and My Redeemer! Psalm 19:14

Dear Barbara,

I believe that truth is not relative and that God defines Truth, and I believe that His Truth is given to us as our guide in the Bible, His Holy Word!

John 14:6 says (Jesus speaking), "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me." And Proverbs 14:12 and 16:25 say, "There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death." Acts 4:12 also says that "salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved." So all ways cannot lead to God because the Bible says that Jesus is the only Way and that some ways lead to death, not to Him.

I know we are talking about spiritual matters here, but this metaphor also applies. When I leave my house, I can get on the interstate. It can take me to Atlanta or to Dallas, but that same road cannot take me to New York - I must get on a different road. Just like you have to get on a particular road to get to a particular place in the physical world, so it is in the spiritual world.

Barbara, I wish I could sit and talk with you face to face and tell you these things because God loves you with an everlasting love and He does indeed want to you know these Truths. He is the Creator, and he is the Father over all created things, but we as humans have turned away from Him and believed lies. We want in a sense to be our own god or make a god for ourselves to worship. But all of us fall short of being God - we are less than His perfection. We cannot be a god for ourselves or for anyone else. We are imperfect and without Him, we are powerless. Romans 3:23 says, "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." However, there is a GOD that longs for us to turn back to Him and have a real relationship with Him in which He guides us.

Because He is the Creator, He is seen in everything - because everything is His handiwork uniquely designed by Him for His pleasure. I think it is true to say that His fingerprints are on everything and everyone and that all beings were created for Him. But this does not imply that all know Him or that He is in all beings. Romans 1:19 says, "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." One can see God in creation and perhaps KNOW the true God, but He is best known through hearing about Jesus.

Romans 5:8 says that "God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Oh, sweet one, God loves you. He seeks after you and longs for you. He loves you more than you could ever begin to imagine. "For God so loved the world (that means you, Barbara, and that means the Jino of China too) that he sent His only Son that whoever believes in Him would have eternal life" (John 3:16).

Unreached? Yes, all those who have never heard the good news of Jesus are unreached. They need to hear about how incredibly awesome He is!!

I pray for those who are unreached because they have never heard the precious good news of Christ, and we, His servants, are to find ways to take His message to them. Romans 10:17 says, "faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ." Romans 10:14-15 say, "How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"

My friend, truly, I long for everyone I know to know this glorious life-changing truth.

Romans 10:9-10 say, "if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved."

To be saved:
1. admit your sin, your imperfection, your need for God
2. believe in Christ as one who came to die for you
3. confess that you want Him to be Lord over you and submit yourself to Him.

If anyone reading this wants to know more about Christ, please contact me here, and I would be happy to talk about this on a personal basis. Also please visit this link for more information.

Praying for all who read to be stirred by Him,

Marital Wisdom

I have about a million and one things that I would like to tell you, but I don't have time to even start and finish tonight, so I am going to direct you to Nancy Leigh DeMoss's site about marriage today. I happened to click on a few blogs and found this interview (July 16, 2009) to be encouraging and challenging. I hope it provides a tiny amount of marital wisdom for you, as I certainly hope to glean some from it.

What's Up?

You may wonder where I am and why I have not posted since last week. I am getting ready for a mission trip to Vail, Arizona. We leave on Saturday, July 4th, and come back on July 11th. I am working like a busy little bee to get everything packed and the house as clean as time will allow before I leave. I've had some distractions, but God is good and His purpose will be achieved.

New verses to memorize:

John 10:10 - The thief comes only to kill, steal, and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.

James 1:2-3 - Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

PS. I am loving the LPM summer siesta bible study - "Me, Myself, and Lies" by Jennifer Rothschild. Great study.

I'm Learning

Last week when the A/C was still out, we visited my mom's house and hung out at her pool a lot. Once again, I learned something. I happened to be sitting out of the pool at this particular time, and my daughter wanted to jump into the pool. Pea had already been jumping in, so she wanted to do it too. And, she wanted to do it BY HERSELF. You know how that goes - they are so jealous of one another, so they have to try to one up the other one. Anyhow, she wanted to do it by herself, but she lacked the follow-through confidence to make it off of the ledge without hurting herself when she jumped. The first time her back hit the wall. The second time her bottom hit the wall. So I said, "Okay, you can't do that anymore." She got in one of her moods and sat down angrily on the edge of the pool. Since I was really a sideline viewer and not an actual participant of the drama, I realized what I had done, which I so often do. I kicked her confidence when it was already low. Of course, what I intended to say was that you need to stop and either jump farther or hold Nana's hand to learn how to jump farther, but that's not the first thing that came out.

My daughter is a lot like me - very sensitive to others, and she really wants to do it right the first time, or she feels like a failure. And of course, as a child, she is still learning how to be confident and do things even when she might mess up at first. The difference between us is that as a child, I did not have an outlet to voice my fears or failures, and as such, I struggled with insecurity and low self esteem for a long time (still do at times). I was taught to stuff my thoughts inside and not to have emotions. My fear is that I will make my daughter into me. So, even though, sometimes there are a lot of emotional fits and tantrums which are unpleasant, I am hoping my daughter has a voice and can learn to talk about these things in a healthy way.

I gave her a few moments to cool off, and then I said, "I'm sorry, Princess." She said in a small voice, "That's okay, Mommy." Then she got up and tried again and had a lot of fun.

Ephesians 6:4 says, "Do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Lord, help me to parent so as not to provoke to anger. Help me to see my children through your eyes that I might encourage when encouragement is needed and instruct when instruction is needed.

Praying for Their Footsteps

Father God,

I pray for Princess that she would grow in understanding of You, Lord, and what it means to tell other people about Jesus. Help her to understand that you do not have to know everything about Jesus to know Him and be His child.

Lord, I pray that Princess would not forget to do good and share with others, for with such sacrifice God is pleased. Hebrews 13:16

Lord, I pray for Pea that he would do to others as he would have done to him. Luke 6:31

I pray that both of them will grow in love - love that is patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast, is not proud. 1 Corinthians 13:4

I pray that that would grow in love for you - that they would desire to obey your commands, because your commands are not burdensome. 1 John 5:3

I continue to pray that they may come to know you at an early age - for everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. Romans 10:13